January 15, 2008
While driving home from the post office, it occurred to me (as it has numerous times) that Hilo really is a special place - the whole Big Island is, really. I saw the older retired man on his bicycle that picks up trash everyday without fail in Hilo with his “Drive with Aloha” sign and his bulging bags of trash. He does a lot for the Hamakua coastline by picking up any and all roadside trash that he sees. A person like him would never be seen in LA, Atlanta, or New York and even if they did exist they would be labeled as crazy. However, here in Hilo, everyone smiles and waves at him - he’s a fixture around here. Many other people in Hilo do something to help make it what it is, however, that particular individual does something unique.
In large cities, people tend to be fearful of the homeless and worry that they might harm them. Here, however, I feel very comfortable about rolling down the window and giving away food without worrying about something bad happening. People here seem to be genuinely kind and good. However, they are trying to pass a panhandling ban for the whole island (like they did in San Francisco) but it leaves me wondering how these people will get the food they desperately need.
Having previously lived in Atlanta, Jacksonville, and Columbus I can definitely say that I would never have left the doors unlocked or open for any reason unless I was entering or leaving the house. I would freak out about every little noise and worry constantly about being murdered, raped, or robbed by someone. Now, living in Hilo, we tend to leave the doors unlocked (during the day) at the house and I don’t worry about people coming in to harm me.
I really think that the sort of kindness that exists around here is special and unique - this sort of thing can only exist when conditions are right - when people are not constantly threatened by crime, hatred, and cruelty. I never actually saw this sort of kindness when I lived on the mainland or special people doing things they were not asked to do for gain.
I think you can only truly appreciate Hawaii and all it has to offer when you learn to trust and embrace humanity again.
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March 10, 2002
I had some realizations about my life today. I am changing the way the business is going to work, taking on more and gaining more success as I go. It has not happened overnight but it is built slowly and over time. For me success and achievement is the result of intense, dedicated hard work and there is often little surprise or amazement associated with it. It becomes matter of fact. It is. Life goes on within that context. Indeed, success breeds new opportunities for success, which must be concentrated on. The playing field gets larger as successes increase. There are more yards to gain and more touchdowns to score. Ambition and drive keep me focused on what is ahead, not on what has happened. I am going to keep living by this mantra of sorts and push on even though the road ahead seems tumultuous yet bearable.
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I had some realizations about my life today. I am changing the way the business is going to work, taking on more and gaining more success as I go. It has not happened overnight but it is built slowly and over time. For me success and achievement is the result of intense, dedicated hard work and there is often little surprise or amazement associated with it. It becomes matter of fact. It is. Life goes on within that context. Indeed, success breeds new opportunities for success, which must be concentrated on. The playing field gets larger as successes increase. There are more yards to gain and more touchdowns to score. Ambition and drive keep me focused on what is ahead, not on what has happened. I am going to keep living by this mantra of sorts and push on even though the road ahead seems tumultuous yet bearable.
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January 15, 2002
In love, you have to put the individual ahead of their actions.. always. It’s comprehension of the past - not condemnation - that neutralizes insecurity. But can we as humans truly do that?
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In love, you have to put the individual ahead of their actions.. always. It’s comprehension of the past - not condemnation - that neutralizes insecurity. But can we as humans truly do that?
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November 20, 2001
I would say today has been low on the mental health scale. I’m fairly annoyed with people in my life. I don’t know if I want to be around people. I don’t know if I want to be here. I don’t know if I want to get out of bed tomorrow. I’m not sure what I do know anymore. My head is full of information and the capacity to compute it all and use it but somehow I am not able to function normally with my given surroundings. I am not really sure how to deal with my feelings because I’ve usually been neutral to most everything.
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October 4, 2001
I’m feeling rather blah this evening. Of course I am, I’m always apathetic, heh. All is well I suppose, of course I have nothing together and I can’t think rationally, except in a erratic rational way, which is quite hard to explain. I suppose what appears rational to me will probably appear irrational to another. Oh well =P
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